I have been lost...

My nephew Zack says so. I'll share that story in a moment, but first...

I'm doing well. I know you wouldn't have a clue about that since I have not posted since my surgery. I apologize. I have no excuse. I just didn't feel like it. Also, I really didn't have much to share except having my gallbladder removed has almost been like magic! It has made such a big difference in my overall well-being. Don't jump too far ahead though. I still have my crashes, and usually allow my weekend to be that time. I was talking to my sister Ranna tonight and realized it is basically controlled crashing. I push myself during the week to get to work and be productive there, and on the weekend I let the crash happen, to whatever degree that may be. Some weekends I have felt great, others not so much.

I believe that the greatest difference I have noticed has been my mood. I have felt so positive and it is so nice. When I went back to work I came home and told Steve that there were two words that people said to me that fit so perfectly, "Welcome Back." I have truly felt that way, for myself. I have felt more like myself in the past month or so than I had for a long time. Optimistic, silly, spontaneous and happy. That is who I really am and it is nice to feel that way.

With that out of the way, on to the good stuff. My nephew Zack will be three in a few weeks. He is very silly and he knows it. His personality is so fun. Last week was my sister Amanda's birthday and he went to grandma's while she and Aaron went out. On their way home from picking him up he informed them he was sad. When Amanda asked him why he was sad, he explained "I lost my Charlene." He then proceeded to talk about me being sick and needing to go to the doctor. She explained that the doctor fixed me and that I am all better. He said, "Oh, Steve had to go to the doctor. He bumped his head." She and Aaron were quite surprised with this conversation and have no idea where it came from. But I sure felt special after she sent me the text telling me I was lost. I saw him a few days later and it was fun to have him be so excited to see me.

Last night my mom had a Lia Sophia jewelry party. I decided to go a little bit early so I could hang out. Both Amanda and Britta were already there with their kids. Amanda came into the living room as I was taking my jacket and my shoes off and hollered at Zack to come see "who's here". His excitement when he saw me was so touching. He ran up and gave me a big hug and kiss. Lately Zack has been afraid of the dark. A few nights ago he was crying before bed and Amanda thought this was the reason. Nope, he was crying because he lost his Charlene, again. While it is sad that he cried about it, I have to say, it is darn cute!

These stories make me feel very special. To put this all in perspective, Ranna watches him every Wednesday. Britta watches him about once a week based on my mom's schedule. Because of the regular visit he has with them it is natural for him to have a good connection with them. I don't see him at any regular intervals. But, now I know he likes to see me and misses me.

Basically, I feel very special and loved!!!!!!!

My take on Prop 8

Hello! This one is all me (Steve). It's a hot button topic, but I'm not scared. Please let me know what you think. Yall should have my Email or you can post it here.

California proposition 8- This is one of my hot button issues lately. A good chunk of my non LDS friends have given me grief about it, until I explain to them my beliefs and the facts on the matter. In this blog, I will attempt to show possibly why my church, with others, got involved in this issue and then I’ll explain my beliefs. I'll break it down into parts and then summarize at the end. I’ve included a bibliography at the bottom where you can find my references.

Marriage as a religious ordinance:
To me, marriage is religious at It's core. I personally believe that government got into it, at first, to keep a record and then realized It's monetary potential. Because of that, I choose to use religious context for marriage.
My religion teaches that marriage is ordained of God; sacred₁. Most Christian religions do. Most religions who believe in the bible also believe Leviticus 18:22, Leviticus 20:13 and
1 Corinthians 7:2 to name three examples. So, why would any Christian church, including the LDS faith, even for a minute, support people who engage in what is believed as abomination worthy of death entering into something they consider to be sacred, ordained of God and between one man and one woman?

The Law:
First, The LDS church didn’t violate any laws in their participation in Prop 8.₅ They did lobby- legal. They did encourage members of the church who felt the same way to go door to door and do things within their power according to their own free will, choice and agency- legal. Billboards are legal. They simply cannot spend the majority of their time lobbying, and, as stated before, taking on issues is also legal so long as they do not endorse a single candidate. So, it doesn’t seem like the church did anything illegal nor did they do anything that would jeopardize their tax-exempt status.

Furthermore, They weren’t alone. There was a coalition of religions who all did the same thing that the LDS church did. Catholics, Baptists, Evangelicals, Jehovah’s Witness, and Jews were also involved- to name a few. I find it rather interesting that the LDS church gets singled out. I have not heard of protests at any other churches, temples or synagogues. Now, envelopes with white powder inside were reported at two LDS temples and at a Catholic Cathedral. By the way, that’s multiple federal offenses for the person(s) who sent it.

Now, here’s a little bit of law for you. I'll tie the relevance in during the summary.

UCA 76-5-403: Sodomy- Forcible Sodomy₆
“(1) A person commits sodomy when the actor engages in any sexual act with a person who is 14 years of age or older involving the genitals of one person and the mouth or anus of another person, regardless of the sex of either participant.
(2) A person commits forcible sodomy when the actor commits sodomy upon another without the other’s consent.
(3) Sodomy is a class B misdemeanor. Forcible sodomy is a felony of the first degree.”

That’s right boys and girls! Oral and anal sex is against the law and punishable by six months in jail and a fine of $1,000, per count.

Now, this law was written with rape in mind, but it effectively makes homosexual/lesbian sex illegal. Again, going towards the “why” would people be against proposition 8.

Influence:
I want to address the “separation of church and state” comment. It seems to me that some people think that Utah is somehow the exclusive place in the U.S. that this occurs. I am not going to say that there isn’t some of this going on in Utah, or any other state, but I don’t think it’s as bad as most people might think. Let’s start here in Utah.
Since we in the United States practice government “of the people for the people”, we draw our statesman from our population. According to adherents.com₇, Utah is 71% LDS. With those numbers, you’re probably going to have an LDS majority in government.

Politicians vote according to two principles-
1. What they want/feel
2. What is politically expedient. (Re-elections, party lines, lobbyists, etc.)

Based on that criteria, it’s probably smart to vote and support things that your constituency likes and wants. If you’re a politician from Utah, you’re probably not going to have a long career if you support abortion and taking away gun rights- UNLESS you live/work in Salt Lake County. In fact, Salt Lake City is one of the toughest liberal strongholds in the United States. A Republican/conservative hasn’t been mayor of Salt Lake City since the early 1970’s. So, I don’t think there is a lot of interaction to/with church leaders and politicians saying “do this or that”.

Now, the exception that proves this rule is just what I’ve said. California, Oregon, New Mexico, Washington and Nevada are all liberal leaning states. They also happen to have a large LDS population. So, you can surmise from this that just because your LDS or from Utah, you’re going to vote a certain way or be prone to direct instruction or illegal influence from church leaders.

Now, Utah is not exclusive to this and neither is ‘Mormonism’. For example, the south is predominantly Southern Baptist. The east is predominantly Catholic. Who do you think makes up their governmental body? Just like Utah, religious population percentage doesn’t determine total or illegal influence or anything that would constitute a violation of the legal definition of separation of church and state.

Summary:
To summarize, I personally believe that religious organizations participated like they did as a statement of their beliefs. It appears that they wish to fight/stand up for what they feel is right. Those who follow the teachings of their religion or conscious have made the acts of homosexual or lesbian sex against the law, so too are they making this their law. I believe the religious organizations simply want to defend what they feel is good, holy and sacred.

So what do I believe?

I personally believe that allowing marriage between homosexual or lesbian couples is wrong. I do not support it in any way, shape or form. Nor do I support civil unions for said persons.

However, the last time I checked, this was a free and capitalist country.

I believe that you have the right as an individual to place anyone you wish on your insurance policy, regardless of residency, income, sexual orientation, relationship, or any other person or group protected under U.S. Title VI.

I believe that you have the right as an individual to grant anyone you wish rights of decision in legal and medical matters.

I believe that you have the right as an individual to claim any person you support as a dependant.

I believe that homosexuals and lesbians are entitles to be treated with the same kindness and respect that would be given any other person.




Bibliography: all scriptures from King James Bible
1.http://lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=e1fa5f74db46c010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD&locale=0&sourceId=1aba862384d20110VgnVCM100000176f620a____&hideNav=1&contentLocale=0
2.Leviticus 18:22 “thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind; it is abomination”
3.Leviticus 20:13 “If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them”
4. 1 Corinthians 7:2 “Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.”
5. http://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p1828.pdf
6. Page 540 of the Utah Code Annotated, enacted 1983
7. http://www.adherents.com/rel_USA.html#Number1

I'm alive...and well

My surgery went well and I am home recovering.

Steve and I arrived at the hospital yesterday morning at about 7:10. My mom rearranged her work schedule so that she could be there as well and she arrived before the nurse took us back. Even though it was early and I was going to be having surgery, I was in a pretty good mood and really wasn't nervous. I received a blessing the night before and it gave me great peace. I had a student nurse follow me all the way through my stay. It was rather interesting, but it was fun to have someone to talk to during the few times I would have been alone otherwise.

According to Steve, the doctor told him that my gallbladder was pretty scarred up and had been causing me some grief for quite some time. The largest stone was too big and had to be crushed before they could remove my gallbladder. For me, having this knowledge gives me a lot of peace with my decision to have it removed. I was a little unsure at one point, even though I was extremely sick.

I can not say enough good about the care I received while at the hospital. Everyone seemed to really be concerned about me and seemed to really enjoy their work. Overall, other than the fact that I had a tough time coming out of the anesthesia, my experience was very positive.

I am able to get up and down realatively easily and even handled a few visitors last night. My pain is under control and I have been in good spirits. I'm quite encouraged at this point and look forward to getting on with life without the nasty attacks.

I want to say thank you to all my family and friends that have shown a great amount of love and support during this time. I feel very loved and very special.

It's too early!

Last night I showered and washed my hair so that this morning all I would have to do is put on my clothes, brush my teeth, take my medicine and go out the door. I set my alarm with plenty of time for a little snooze button action, but we both slept so rough last night that we didn't need it. We got the "I'm anticipating a certain event tomorrow" sleep. You all know what I am talking about... Steve and I are up and ready to go with plenty of time to spare. Steve is not feeling well and I'm just plain tired.

I need to be there by 7:15. This means I'm not the first person but I am close to the beginning. I guess that's a good thing. Get the surgeon while he's still relatively fresh in the morning and not tired in the afternoon. So, wish me luck. I'm off to see the surgeon...

Moving Forward

I had my appointment with the surgeon today. It was laid out to me that there really weren't many "real" options. Because of the severity and frequency of my attacks not having my gallbladder removed is the best option.

Steve went with me and asked, "Are there any other options?" The surgeon simply said, "Yes, you can be in pain." He also said there is a medication that I could take to break up the stones...for the rest of my life, and they do not know the side effects of taking it that long. Ummm, no thanks! I could also have an ultrasound to break up the stones. The problem with the ultrasound is that there isn't even one of the machines needed for it in the state of Utah. There are more complications with that than there is with the surgery.

So, you guessed it, I opted to just have it removed. Both my parents have had the surgery and they seem to be pretty darn healthy. The doctor is headed out of town this weekend and said he could fit me in on Thursday, otherwise I would have to wait about 2 weeks. Again, ummm, no thanks! If I am going to do it let's just get it done. The surgery will be done laparoscopically and I should be able to go home the same day. I don't know what time yet, I will find that out tomorrow.

Regardless, I will likely not be posting for a while. Maybe I'll see if Steve can at least post an update to let everyone know how I am doing. We'll see.

Low-fat = Blah

I know this is going to come as a shock to you all, seeing as I am such a health buff...

Eating a gluten-free AND low-fat is not only boring, but it is really difficult and I don't like it! I am still struggling with food, even if it is basically non-fat. My whole body is very sensitive to anything I eat and it seems that the only thing that really has little or no effect is applesauce. But, Steve tells me I can't live on applesauce alone.

In the meantime, I eat what I can of what won't make me sick or give me pain and I meet with the general surgeon tomorrow to discuss my options. That will give me a better idea of how long I'm going to be feeling like this. I'll keep you posted.

Just In Time

Steve is home. This actually ended up not being a difficult decision. I'll explain...

This past weekend I had another episode of my rude awakening, except without the visit to the chiropractor. At some point during this "attack" I realized it was something more serious than my ribs being out. It could be that I had just had an adjustment that day, it could be that I realized it was all focused in the pit of my stomach. But I was tempted to go to the ER that night. In retrospect it would have been a good thing to do. I didn't want to go in without Steve though. I had a feeling that I was having trouble with my gallbladder and I was afraid of emergency surgery. So, I stuck it out and slept all day Sunday to recover.

I talked to Steve Sunday night and we started talking seriously about him coming home. He was upset with me for not going to the hospital and told me to go if I needed to whether he was there or not. I told him I really was concerned and that I wanted him to come home. He had a few things to pull together before leaving so we decided he would probably leave on Thursday and get home on Friday.

Monday, I decided that I needed to see a doctor for this because it has happened too many times and something was really wrong. I called my primary care's office and was able to get in that afternoon. I told him my theory was gallbladder but he disagreed with me based on my symptoms. He felt it was an ulcer and gave me a sample of Prevacid and took some blood to check for the H Pylori bacteria. I said ok and went home. I still didn't feel well.

Tuesday night, I had another "attack". It was earlier in the evening, before going to bed instead of waking me up. My dad came over to give me a blessing and I was told that things would calm down, I would be able to get some sleep and go to work as I needed to do. Around midnight I did receive enough relief to get some sleep, but it did not go away completely.

Wednesday I was tempted to stay home, even go in late but I pushed myself and went in on time. I worked the entire day although I was not well. I called the doctor's office for my lab results. The H Pylori was negative. It was not an ulcer and the doctor wanted me to arrange to have an ultrasound. I set this up for Monday morning, although I was not sure I would make it until then. At some point in the late afternoon, Steve called me to cheer me up. He said he had a surprise for me and wanted me to look at the bank account online and tell him what the last transaction was. He was already on his way home and in Tucumcari, NM. I started to cry, his timing was perfect. I needed him home with me. I was very sick and was not getting better. I promised him, and myself, that if I had another attack that I would go to the hospital.

Thursday morning, approx. 5:00 a.m., Steve walked in the door. He drove 20 hours straight from Justin, Texas to our home in West Jordan, UT stopping only for gas. I was asleep but woke up when the door opened. I can not describe how comforting it was to have him home with me. Even though I had been sleeping, and Steve was exhausted and needed sleep, we talked and just enjoyed each other until about 6:00. Emotionally, I felt so relieved. Physically, I still hurt.

I hate the alarm. I always have but it is worse when I am sick. I have to make the decision to get out of bed and go to work when I feel that I need to stay home or stay home. Thursday, my bed won. I was comfortable enough that I wasn't in too much pain, as long as I didn't move. I had to get out of bed to use the bathroom and boy did I feel it. It wasn't a full attack but it was enough that I felt work was not a good thing for me that day. I called the office, went back to bed and slept until noon. Around 2:00 I felt I could handle a shower and it helped, for a moment. I crashed and went back to bed at 3:00. Steve woke me up at 6:00 for dinner and an appointment we needed to go to at 7:00 but I felt worse than I had all day. We got home at 8:00 and I went straight to bed.

Sleep did not come. By 9:00 I thought I might be in trouble and by 10:00 it was very clear that I was. Unfortunately for me, by this time Steve was asleep and due to his drive the previous day/night he was in no condition to skip sleep. He fell asleep mid-conversation. I called my mom for her medical opinion. I couldn't wait until Steve could get enough sleep to take me to the hospital so my dad took me. We got right in, literally. Within about 30-45 minutes of arriving at the hospital I was in having an ultrasound. By the time she was done with the ultrasound the morphine was really kicking in and I was starting to feel pretty good. When I got back to my room I finally had to really wait, but at this point I didn't care. I was loopy and grateful to be in that state. It felt good!

After about a half hour the doctor came in to give us the update. Because my pain was heading to the left side of my stomach they were somewhat concerned about my pancreas as well. Luckily, there were no signs of infection. They did find exactly what I expected, several gallstones. The largest was 1.7 cm in diameter. That is not a small stone! For perspective, that is the size of my thumbnail! He did say that other than the stones, which were the cause of the pain, my gallbladder looked good so I did not need emergency surgery. He referred me to a general surgeon to discuss my long term options and gave me prescriptions for Lortab and Toradol to manage any attacks I may have until I could see the doctor.

We left the hospital barely after 1:00 a.m. We were there just over 2 hours - a very quick visit! We stopped at Walgreen's on the way home to fill my prescriptions and I climbed right in bed. Steve was still not coherent. He chatted with me but was gone! I still felt good and slept quite well. This morning I called my boss and the office to give an update and informed them I would not be in. I needed to recouperate. Needless to say it has been an interesting week.

Overall, I am very relieved to know what is going on and that I have a direction to go. I meet with the general surgeon on Tuesday to go over my options. This knowledge brings a lot of light to past issues. Remember my vacation? Yeah, same thing. Christmas? Then too. I wish I figured it out sooner rather than later, but I know now.

And knowing is half the battle...

Warning! Honest and emotional update...

The past few weeks have been very emotional. Most days too much so for me to post anything. In case you didn't already know, things have not gone according to plan. The guy Steve had a written offer of employment with was an idiot and canceled every meeting they had scheduled for a week. After a week of not being able to do what he went there to do, he decided to look elsewhere. We felt that was the right thing to do and that we needed to continue working on getting us set up there.

I have asked Steve to write an update to how things are going because he can explain it so much better than I can...

Charlene asked me to write an update, so here it is.

Nothing has changed. I’ve had several interviews, applied for over 60 jobs and nothing. Apparently I’m proprietary and was even told that because my experience was in Utah, it didn’t mean anything. That person got a glimpse at Stormy. I have been absolutely shocked by the attitude of people here. Everyone is warm and friendly until they find out that you’re not a Texan. These people are brainwashed. It’s Texas first, then country, then family, then God. At least that’s how it’s come across to me. Then I find out they teach “Texas first” in schools starting in elementary and I can’t help but think about what Hitler did with the ‘Hitler Youth’. It’s the same thing. It sickens me.

Overall, I’m tired. I can’t seem to sleep anymore. I worry about making bills, keeping commitments and being away from Charlene. She tells me not to worry about that, but.. yeah, right. I think you all know better than that.

I interviewed for a job Friday (the 26^th) and they really liked me. They are the first to take me for what I have to offer instead of where I’m from. If I get that one, I’ll stay. If not, I may come home.

I’m very homesick. This has been a massive trial of my patience, faith, trust and endurance. I don’t know how much more I can take. I feel so much pressure to get going here, coupled with having to learn a whole new area that I feel like I’m about to break. I don’t know how anyone just picks up and moves to an area with no job and just sets up shop without a lot of money. This is the hardest thing I have ever done in my life.

I’m staying with my best friend. Even with him, his wife, infant daughter and his brother here I feel very much alone. Now, while I am convinced that’s why I’ve lasted this long, I think it’s also added to the stress. I didn’t realize how much real autonomy I had until I came here. Now, don’t get it twisted, I am grateful to them for the hospitality. I have it GOOD, but it’s about time to get out- even if I do stay here.

I’ve laid awake at night wondering why I came. I was so sure this was the right thing to do. I was so sure that this is where Charlene and I needed to be. Now I’m trying to figure out if it was inspired or if it was my own mind. If it was inspired, what was the point? Was it supposed to be me come out, get a job and have Charlene come out like we planned or was it supposed to be a pure trial for me? Was I supposed to come down for other reasons? Was it a combination of them all?

One day at a time.

So, I guess you could say that I’m coming full circle from my last update eh?

The good news is that despite all the trials I’ve had, I’ve come a long way. I’ve grown by leaps and bounds. My eyes have been opened quite a bit. Charlene and I have really come a long way as well. It’s been rough with the distance, but we’ve adjusted to that. I can’t wait to see her again though.

I learned a lot of what I’m made of. How much I’m really willing to go through for what I want. The problem with that is figuring out what it is I want. This trip cleared it up in a hurry. I would much rather be able to rely on myself if I can. No bed of roses, for sure, but at least I can trust my boss.

That reminds me, if any of you know of where to get business capital that’s NOT a loan, I’m all ears. Actually, I might consider a loan or investor if the deal is right, so send those too. Also, if any of you are good with fiberglass or know somebody who could teach me- it would help. Eventually I would like to produce several products of my own as well as distribute others that are in the same category, but it takes time to build it.

I’m reminded of the words of a song. It’s called “Until the End” by Breaking Benjamin. I guess it’s kind of how I feel about being here right now.

Listen to it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkbGzDWhcVw

Lyrics:

So clever, Whatever. I'm done with these endeavors. Alone I walk the winding way. (Here I stay)
It's over, No longer, I feel it growing stronger. I'll live to die another day, Until I fade away.

[Chorus:]
Why give up, why give in? It's not enough, it never is. So I will go on until the end. We've become desolate. It's not enough, it never is. But I will go on until the end.

Surround me, It's easy To fall apart completely. I feel you creeping up again. (In my head)
It's over, No longer, I feel it growing colder. I knew this day would come to end, So let this life begin.

[Chorus]

I've lost my way. I've lost my way, but I will go on until the end.
Living is hard enough Without you *beep* up.

[Chorus]
I've lost my way. I've lost my way, but I will go on until the end.
The final fight I'll win, The final fight I'll win, The final fight I'll win, But I will go on until the end.

Dad, how did you do it? How did you pick up, go and make it work so often? How did you deal with all the TDY’s, alerts and other time away. Add to that 20 years with one organization and I’m totally baffled. Granted, it was the military and I’m dealing with *beep* *beep* beepity beep* security companies and owner, but still. WOW!

Randy, I don’t know how you do it. How do you just seem to have undying patience and faith. That’s strength I can only dream about right now.

Scott, you inspire me. You have constantly picked yourself up by the bootstraps time and time again. You get knocked HARD but I’ve never seen you quit. You have the tenacity of a pitbull, but with intelligence and purpose. You have built yourself a nice life.

Dirk, I admire the strength and ‘testicular fortitude’ it took to just up and move across the country. Then you’re successful. You have done well for yourself. You keep yourself grounded and down to earth. I like that.

John, I admire the hell out of you, man. Talk about self made- humble about it too. Granted, you have the benefit of a college education, but still. That’s some DAMN hard work you’ve done.

Now, all of you have taught me something or inspired me in one or more ways. I look to you all as examples. I hope to pick up the right habits and become successful. I guess that’s why I’m here.

SO, I’m going to take things one day at a time until there is no more time I suppose. I know it sounds like I complained a lot, but it was more me just telling you how I’m feeling. It’s not a new thing in the world. I’m not wanting sympathy. Just…. Sharing.

So, there you go. That’s my update. Nobody ever said I was PC or positive all the time, but you can’t accuse me of not telling it like it is.

Ok, that’s all for me. Charlene’s gonna write some stuff now. Cheers.

Even though it has been rough, we have definitely had some good experiences. I feel that we are closer because of needing to rely so much on each other and God at the same time.

So, there you go. That is our update for now. I do have some fun stories to share, but that will have to come at another time.

Steve's journey, from his point of view

A lot of people have wondered why I went to Texas. Most of the questions were “why?” or “why Texas?” and my personal favorite “What the hell you wanna do somthin’ like that for?” Well, honestly, there are a lot of reasons. I’m not going to apologize; nor do I feel obligated to articulate myself to anyone but my wife and God, but I wish to address a few of the things that lead me to Texas.

It started June 2, 1999-the day I graduated from high school. It came to a head when I was working for the state. I was sick and tired of the bull associated with security and law enforcement- especially on military bases. I knew there was more. All the dishonesty, politics, fighting for paychecks, uncertainty in the field, dumb co-workers and, frankly, I’m tired of seeing so much pain all the time. People all carry it, but people in my profession see a lot more of it than most. It was rare for me to have a happy day. They were mostly all negative and I usually only saw the bad side of people. It turned my very callous and has turned me into a somewhat angry person. In short, I stopped caring about people. The job became more about babysitting stupid people than helping people. People were an annoyance to me.

SO, I went to commercial flight school, came back…and went back into field work. (stupid stupid stupid!)

Well, I got very sick of it very fast. Almost exactly one year ago, I had my bags packed and I THOUGHT I had an offer of employment. Then a little voice in my mind told me to double check. The person decided to change the deal and offered me HALF the pay and no other benefits. That’s when I got hooked up with the last company in Utah. (I won’t name them for now) I came on as the Security Manager. Three weeks in, I find out that the sites that we’re working are not ”in house” gigs after all like I had been told. They were straight on contracts. Once again, I got lied to and found out about it at 2am because an investigator from the state just raided one of our sites. I was not amused to say the least. It took several weeks of no pay and no work before the license got taken care of. I was looking for other work, but didn’t find it. The owner asked me to stay to make it work and I accepted.

So we got back to work. Back to security and teaching licensing classes. Then, like before, it was nothing but lies, half truths, dumb guards, annoying clients, paychecks that were 2-6 weeks LATE and getting ignored by the owner. Then, we lost all but one client and all at once. I was spared because I was teaching- the one part of the company actually making money… Until I, once again, didn’t get a paycheck (that I’m still fighting for!) Then the email came. A very unceremonious, demeaning, and condescending firing. After a year of busting my butt for him and getting the “loyalty” speech all the time, he fires me in an email and has an attitude about it. That was the second to last straw.

I second to last because, for me, when the last straw gets broken, I get physical. It has been a very long time since I’ve harmed somebody out of anger. However, the thought did pass my mind many a time more intense and vivid than I can recall ever in my life. There was one day I was convinced that I had to. ..umm…let’s just say I was intent on committing a felony. Thankfully, my better sense prevailed and it talked me out of it. Granted, I was moments from doing it, but I didn’t do it.

Now, why tell you that? I want you to understand my mind frame. It’s not something I’m proud of, but it’s part of why I came here. So, again, the question of why.

Illness and fatigue. I was sick and tired. Sick of dealing with dishonesty. Tired of not being able to pay my bills. Sick of working so hard for so little reward and tired of begging for money I’ve already earned. Sick of having to talk to my landlord and promising rent I didn’t know if I would get and tired of seeing Charlene hurting over it. Sick of the same thing for 10 years and tired of the attitudes of owners, managers and people in general. Sick of business owners preaching loyalty and tired of not getting it in return. Sick of being a nobody and tired of doing nothing with my life.

So, the opportunity came up to come to Texas. To change my location; To try something new; To work with my best friend; To really do something. You see, I didn’t know if I could. I remember how hard flight school was. I remember how hard going to New Orleans was, way back when. I was (am) very worried if I could make it and make this a success; nervous to see if I had what it takes to truly be successful.

So, you ask me why… because I need to. I need this. I need to know that I can do this. That when the time comes, I can get things done and handle business. I need to prove to myself that I wasn’t in the position I was in because of Utah. The opposite is also true; I want to prove some of why I am where I am is BECAUSE I was in Utah. I’m leaving that vague because there are several things on both ends for me and I want to keep them private.

Ya know, I never told him, but I really admired my youngest brother, Chris, for picking up and moving to Vermont with his Wife and Daughter. Granted, they have her family there, but that must have taken a lot of courage to do so. But since he has, I have seen the growth in him. I have witnessed his spiritual growth explode. I have witnessed him become a man and he has become one of my best friends, as are all my brothers.

Frankly, I want that. I think my growth was about as far as I could get for the moment there in Utah. Granted, we never truly stop growing and learning, but I feel mine was really stifled. I recognize and admit that it might be partly my fault that that was the situation, however, I would never do something to intentionally slow or stop my learning and progression. I am a proud person, but I promise I was not looking for fights (99% of the time anyway). There is no way I can possibly articulate to you all how it feels to wake up and wonder why God allowed me to do so; to wonder why I was here; to get out of bed every day and look forward to two things - seeing Charlene come home from work and going to bed…at 2 or 3 in the morning.

My parents, who seem to get smarter every day, taught me that there are two things you can do when faced with adversity. They said you can do nothing and be stuck or you can stand up and do something about it. I’m doing that something. I can’t sit anymore. I can’t just let things roll off my back and be nice. Now, I don’t want to go back to mean/angry Steve, but I can’t just stagnate - which is exactly what I had done.

I want to keep the promises I’ve made. I want to be the husband I said I would be to a wife who has never let me down and shown me never ending love, support and forgiveness when I fell short. God blessed me with one of his most choice daughters; the least I can do is take care of her like he expects me to. God has a way of taking things away from you when you don’t do that. I’d rather he not.

So, the road here was long and difficult; more so than I can articulate. I’m not whining; we all face trials. I’m not saying I’m a special case; there are others much worse off than me. I simply want you to get into the mindset that I have right now.

That said, the road to Texas was almost as long. Two days of driving. I got to bed Friday night at about 11pm, fell asleep about 12:45 and got up about 4:45. After some last minute car packing with Charlene and a very emotional goodbye, I was on the road at about 6am. I topped off my tank down the road from the house and got on I-15 south. I stopped in Payson for breakfast to go and got back underway. My route took me to Scipio, Moab, cut the corner of Colorado, then drop in New Mexico with a primary goal of Albuquerque for an overnight stay. Then from there I went through Amarillo, Wichita Falls and on in to Justin. I made it all the way to Moab on ¾ of a tank. I was pretty stoked. I stopped for fuel a few times in New Mexico and a twice in Texas. I know it sounds like a lot, but most of them were stops because I was down to half a tank and the next stop was out of the range left on my tank. I really didn’t spend that much on fuel.

New Mexico is probably my least favorite state in the union (California and other liberal states are a close second) and it reminded me why on the way down here. In Colorado, the speed limit out in BFE was 75. So, I’m cookin’ it down the highway and then there’s a big sign that says “Welcome to New Mexico” next to another one that says “Speed Limit 45”. We’re in the middle of the freaking desert folks. There is NOTHING out there. Zip. Zero. Ziltch. Nadda. Nill. So, after about 30 miles of that crap, the limit jumped up to 65. Ok, I can deal with that. Then suddenly, again 45 MPH. Then 70. Then 45. Then 30. Then 75. Then 35. Then 45. Then 30. Finally, I got ticked off and said “FINE! Give me a damn ticket! I am NOT going 30 MPH across this state!” Just as I said that, I looked up and there was a BIA police officer. I forgot, I’m in Indian territory and they like money. No wonder why the speed limits suck..it’s one giant speed trap. Glad I didn’t gun it like I was about to do.

I got into Albuquerque about 5pm. I have some friends stationed at Kirtland AFB there, so I visited with them for a couple of hours, but I was absolutely knackered from driving and was getting sick, so I chose to find a hotel; and it’s a good thing I did. I got in bed and a few hours later, I woke up with a sudden urge to pray to the porcelain god, which I did every 90 minutes or so. I tried to sleep, but I finally just gave up and decided I needed to hit the road.

Now, back to my mindset for a moment.

At this point (overnight), I hadn’t really slept well for nearly a month and I really hadn’t slept well after 11 hours of driving after sleeping for a few hours prior. My morale was, pardon the pun, in the toilet. I damn near turned around and went home. I thought to myself “What kind of idiot does this? What the hell am I doing going to Texas? I belong at home in Utah with my wife. This is dumb!”

I called Charlene and told her how I was feeling. She, in true Charlene fashion, told me not to. That she believed in me and that this IS the right thing to do. She tried to make me promise her that I would just go, but she settled for me promising not to make a decision until I had slept and wasn’t emotionally and physically drained.

One LONG talk with God, a few cat naps and a few sprints later, I decided to press on.

I got my guns back in the car, got my GPS running, made sure I had my road atlas set to the right page, had my waypoint instructions (I did mapquest in waypoints) out, got my key card turned in, topped off the tank and hit the road while it was still dark. An hour later, my eyes were stinging from exhaustion. I cranked up my A/C and my radio (actually found a cool classic rock station) and kept going.

I’ve talked about how much I dislike New Mexico, but that sunrise was like nothing I have ever seen before. I noticed it as I crested a hill. It happened to be an area that was pretty flat below where I was, slightly hazy and foggy but horizon as far as I could see. The colors of deep red, purple, green, grey, orange and yellow all mixed to create a sight that I doubt I will ever forget. It was gorgeous. At that moment, I felt God. I feel like I was looking at a painting that he had finished and placed there so I could see it. I know it sounds corny, but it was religious. I wish I had stopped and taken a picture. No words could do it justice.

I got in to Amarillo at about 9am. By this time, my stomach had calmed some so I figured maybe now was a good time to eat. I topped off the tank and got some food in my stomach (to go, of course) and it seemed to help. However, I was having a hard time keeping the eyelids open, so in my infinite (deliriously tired) wisdom, I decided to pick up the pace. (no, not the salsa and not that Pace. I did that 7 years ago!) There were points on US-287 between Wichita Falls and Justin that I was over 110 MPH because I KNEW I was getting close to the end of my endurance. Not the smartest or safest thing to do, especially tired, but it helped me make up some of the time from sleeping overnight.

As I was getting into Justin, Mike (best friend, who I’m staying with) called me and told me that he was heading to the store, so I just met him there. It was nice to see him again; and to stand up. I had, after all, just been in the car for nearly 2 straight days. I was anxious to get parked though, so we got here, relaxed for a minute, then unpacked the car. I went to bed that night (Sunday) and slept solid for 11 hours. It was the first time in quite a while that I really rested. It was nice.

So, now the journey begins. Time to put my money where my mouth is and make this work. If I can pull it off, Charlene will join me by Halloween. If not, I’m coming home…but don’t expect me back yet. I’m not sold that I’m not crazy for coming here, but I’m going to really give it a go.

I hope I answered some questions. If I didn’t, oh well. I just wanted to give you some insight so maybe, just maybe, you can see where I’m at in life from my perspective. I’m tired and already more home sick than I was at flight school, but I’m pushing. I want to be able to hold my head up and say I accomplished something real in life. I want to be able to look certain people in the eye and say “I did it. I kept my promises.” I love Charlene and want to be near her, but I want her to come here and I want to be able to say “Hun, look at the life I’m carving out for us here. I did it this far, but I want to do the rest with you.”

And that is the point of coming to Texas.

A softer side of Steve

I have really been having fun on the computer tonight. I just wanted to share a few recent pictures of Steve that I LOVE!

Those blue eyes get me...frequently!

He looks so innocent. How can you resist this face?

I love you Steve!

A whole lot of randomness...

I have several thoughts running through my mind right now. Can't say that this post is going to make much sense of anything but it is what you are going to get. I'm in the mood to tell stories.

Randomness #1
I don't post daily or even on a real regular basis but I definitely have blogs that I read daily. I come home from work, check my email, download my games (I am a junkie!) and rotate through the blogs. Some of them post nearly every day, some a lot less than me. But I get to catch up on stories from family and friends and some people I really don't know but for some reason I just really enjoy reading them. I don't comment often but know this, I read them, I love them! Often, I think about posting something and then decide I don't have the mental energy to do so. "I'll post later" I think. Yeah right.

As you can see, I did a pretty major overhaul. I've been wanting to do it for a while but again, lack of mental energy and "I'll do it later". I think the biggest problem is I do a lot of creative stuff at work and I don't want to do anymore by the time I get home. Now that it is done I think you are stuck with this layout for a while. The good news is, Steve loves it. Go me!

Randomness #2
Several weeks ago I was babysitting Zack for Amanda and Aaron while they went on a date. I had a few people come over and visit during that time and we all decided we were hungry. We piled in Steve's car, it fits several people and the booster seat better than my beetle, and went off to find dinner. Because of my silly and annoying dietary needs we ran to a few different places. But that is not the point. The point is we were in Steve's car. Steve has very eclectic taste in music. He has so many playlists put together on cds in his car it isn't funny. No really, it's not. They aren't labeled well, or aren't labeled at all. He frequently asks me to put a cd in while we are driving and when I put something in I have no idea what is going to play. Well, whatever was in that day was fine for my mood so we left it. The next thing I know we are listening to "Ice, Ice Baby" and Zack is mimicing right along. We all laughed so hard! He really loved that song.

The part about this that I love the most is this. We taught him to respond with "Ice, Ice Baby" any time we say "vanilla". When mom and dad came to pick him up he was dead asleep. I was afraid by this time that he would have forgotten but I really wanted them to hear it so I gave it a chance. He remembered and responded even though he was barely awake and it was so cute! He still responds, right on cue. Simple minds, simple pleasures.

Randomness #3
I have too many projects to work on. I just barely finished an afghan last night that I started 3 years ago. Too my defense, it was not an easy one. I had to change colors after every single row. That is a lot of color changing and working in ends. I could only take so much of it before I just had to put it down, for a long time. Well, I recently got a request for an afghan and decided it was not fair to start that one until I had finished this one that is long over due. It is a gift. A wedding gift. They celebrate 3 years this month. Again, in my defense, they eloped and we didn't have advance notice so it was started after they got married. I know, poor excuse. But, it is finished now and I can move on.
Now if only I can finish the 2 cross-stitch projects in progress, the ceremics I need to paint to complete my Christmas village and all the other miscellaneous projects I have I'll be in good shape. Of course if I got all that done the sky might actually fall.

It has officially begun...

For those of you who already know, this is an update. For those of you who don't know, here is our latest news. For over a year, Steve has been working toward a specific job opportunity in Texas. He finally got it and left Saturday to go start working. He will be staying with our friends, Mike and Sarah, until I am able to move down. He drove by himself and was very nervous about the drive, but he made it safe this afternoon.

We are giving it 2 weeks before I give my notice at to allow time to make sure everything is going to work out well and then it will be another few weeks before we make the actual move so it will be mid-October before it happens. We both have very mixed emotions but we have been working on this for quite some time and we are excited to see what will happen.

Please consider us in your thoughts and prayers, especially Steve as he is away from home and in a new, somewhat scary situation.

Baptisms

Steve and I recently had a few baptisms in our family. Brayden was baptized on July 26 and Jaedyn was baptized on August 2. Both baptisms were fabulous but they were very different.

Brayden is 10 and was baptized after taking the missionary discussions. Scott and Debi were inactive until recently and it was very exciting for us to be there, especially because Scott both baptized and confirmed Brayden. It was fun to have the baptism completely dedicated to Brayden. We went to Golden Corral for dinner afterwards and then to Steve's parents for cake and icecream for his mom's birthday. We really had a good time and it was fun to just spend some time with family. We really don't see Scott, Debi and the kids often enough.

Brayden received a gift from the primary that I really liked. He received a white towel with his name and baptism date embroidered on it with the following poem, they use blue thread for boys and pink for girls:

My Baptism Towel

This baptism towel is to help remind you of your baptism day all the years through.

When you come out of the water all clean and pure, Dry off with towel and you can be sure that you are as cleans as this towel is white, And the Holy Ghost will be with you both day and night.

For the Holy Ghost is your gift after the laying on of hands, And will be comfort and a guide if you obey God's commands.

When your towel becomes soiled, remember that we too may sometimes make mistakes and we've been taught what to do. Just as you can be washed away and never again be seen.

Your Heavenly Father loves you; remember always to pary, And He will be beside you forever and a day.

Jaedyn turned 8 last month and her baptism was shared with another kid in her ward. Jade's dad even came up from St. George to be there. Ryan baptized her and that was exciting as well because it was only earlier this year that he was ordained an elder and he and Melissa went to the temple. Unfortunately for me, I had to leave pretty much right after the baptism to work for 2 hours. Steve stayed there and hung out with his parents until I finished. Then I met Steve, his parents and Ryan and his gang for dinner. After dinner, Steve and I went to see "Mama Mia" with his parents. I enjoyed it, Steve not as much. But it is a fun girl's night movie and the music was definitely enjoyable.

Mikey posing at dinner. He's copying dad!

Overall, two very different, important events one weekend after another and both very enjoyable days.

Life

Okay, I really can't believe it has been as long as it has since I have posted anything. There have been several events that I have thought about posting and then did not.

I truly apologize. It's time to come clean.

Frankly, I have been emotionally elsewhere. Last month I went to the doctor for a physical (I hadn't had one in about 2 1/2 years). I got some less than desirable results. My pap smear came back abnormal, as high-grade squamous intraepithelial lesion (HSIL) to be exact.

"HSIL stands for high-grade squamous intraepithelial lesion. High-grade means the cells are very different from normal cells. These cells are usually precancerous and are more likely to lead to cervical cancer. Your doctor will probably perform a colposcopy to determine how at risk you are for cancer." www.familydoctor.org

Since I went to my family physician he suggested I see a gynecologist for further testing. I didn't have one. I had fired my last one, LONG story, and had not yet found another. This was one of the reasons I hadn't had a physical for so long. Due to my myriad of issues, I decided to call my insurance to see if there was one they could recommend that might have experience with my particular issues. The doctor they referred me to happens to be a D.O., Doctor of Osteopathy. This is a plus in my book as D.O.s are trained to look at a whole body perspective and tend to accept natural options quicker than many other doctors.

Long story, short version, my appointment was last week on Monday. I had a colposcopy, which basically entails the doctor using a few different dyes to help any issues show up and using a microscope to see them. If there are any issues, a biopsy is done. Steve went with me and we left with no biopsy done and the doctor describing my cervix as "pink, pretty and perfect". A bit of an odd description, but I guess compared to what it could look like it must be accurate. We were somewhat relieved and encouraged but knew I was not out of the woods yet. He said the edge looked like there might be an issue he couldn't see so he took a scraping, basically a pap smear on steroids, to double-check.

Today I received my results. I am clear. No signs of any abnormal cells. I don't know how my original test showed such scary abnormalities but there isn't any now. Another medical disaster averted!

So, there is my reason for not posting for 3 weeks. Take it or leave it. I might just be up to catching up from the last month. I've got some good stuff...at least I think so.

Double Feature - Pioneer Day & Flashback Friday

I have decided to write a double feature blog. Since it is Friday it is Flashback Friday, that was inspired by my Pioneer Day fun last night.

Pioneer Day

Before anyone else decides to ask me, no we did not go to the parade. Steve worked the night before and I slept in. The parade is not a tradition for us so it doesn't usually even cross our mind. If it does, we very quickly decide we would rather sleep in. As I was contemplating actually getting out of bed, Amanda called me and asked me if I could watch Zack. They had a friend who needed some help and didn't feel that they could take him with them. I hesitated slightly, only because I knew that Steve would be sleeping and I didn't want to wake him up. But of course I said yes. How can I resist an opportunity to play with any of my nieces or nephews?

So Zack came over and spent the day with me. Zack LOVES Thomas the Tank Engine and he got a new video while we were on vaction. He knows nearly all the names of Thomas and his friends but there are some new friends on this video. Zack will frequently play the "Who's that?" game. He asks "who's that?" and then answers his own question. He was playing the game and asked about the yellow flat bed truck on the front of the video case but he couldn't remember her name and Amanda couldn't either. So, we had to watch it. In case anyone wants to know, her name is Isabella...

Unfortunately, Steve's boss called him and woke him up during Thomas and then he heard us. My only consolation is that we weren't the ones who woke him up in the first place. We are just the ones who distracted him enough that he couldn't go back to sleep. So Steve got up and spent a little bit of time on his computer in the office waking up a bit.

After Thomas, Zack wanted to watch Bee Movie, but when we opened it up he said "oh no! All gone!" So he chose Cars. I hadn't ever seen all of Cars so I was okay with it. Besides, it's a Pixar movie. How can you go wrong? I had seen the beginning so I decided to get some of our massive pile of dirty dishes done while Zack watched and played and then joined him. Steve eventually joined us and we ended up nearly rolling on the floor watching Zack. He was quoting the movie and singing and dancing during the songs. It was a lot of fun!

About 2:00 Amanda sent me a message and said she forgot to tell me about his nap and asked if I had put him down. Zack was in such a good mood that I totally spaced nap time, it did not even cross my mind. I was even going to take him shopping with me. Whoops! I put him down right then and then Steve took a small nap on the couch while I went to the store.

Amanda and Aaron came to pick him up about 5:00 and he was still laying down. Amanda and I went to wake him up and he was already awake, he just hadn't come out of the room. He got very excited to see mommy and when she asked him if he had fun he said "No, go home!" I had to laugh, we did too! He really was a good boy and we had lots of fun playing. They left to finish getting ready for the barbeque Britta was having for the family at her house. Steve got ready for work and after he left I finished getting ready to go as well.

Britta covers everything pretty well, so if you want details about the barbeque, go to http://nunleyfam.blogspot.com/2008/07/pioneer-day-barbeque.html.

Flashback Friday

While I was at Britta's for the barbeque last night I was able to see her nearly finished back yard. She has a hill in the back (on purpose) for her kids to play on. This is the inspiration for my Flashback Friday.

My parent's have a small hill in the front yard that we grew up playing on. The reason I say on purpose above is simply this: to this day, my mom hates that hill. It was there when they bought the house and she has tried several times to get rid of it. I don't know if we always talked her out of it or if other things just took priority, but it is still there.

Personally, I am glad. We had SO much fun playing on the hill growing up and the grandkids have fun now. I told Britta last night that she was missing something on her hill, the pot holes. She apparently decided that, regardless of how much we used them, she didn't want them in her hill. I do understand why because we destroyed the grass in that area by using them for our witches brew, which I have previously posted about.

In addition to witches brew the hill provided safety while playing tag, a castle for the frequently overturned king of the hill, a stage and many more. We rolled down the hill, we ran through sprinklers on the hill and sprained ankles on the hill. The fun was endless and still is. And lucky for us, if we had too many people and our hill was too small, we ran next door to the park. We always had plenty of space there.

In my adulthood, I am always reminded that I had an amazing childhood. Sometimes it is hearing how difficult someone else's childhood was and sometimes it is just spending time with my family and following the eternal memory lane. I am grateful for the family I have and I love you all!

Family vacation - part 2

Picking up where I left off...

Thursday morning when we got up I was a little worried about how I was going to feel that day. My back was hurting and my stomach didn't feel great either. But I decided to do everything I could to get it to calm down (in addition to a blessing the previous night) and by the time we left I felt good. We got on the road to San Francisco. But before leaving I had to take a picture of this little food shack that made me laugh.

On the road to San Francisco, we saw a sign for another drive-through tree. We decided to stop and this one looked a lot more like we were all envisioning. We had a blast here because there was another log that was hollow and I could stand up inside it. I got a great picture of me and all the kids and Aaron decided to climb on top of it. I even got brave and climbed up. I'm afraid of heights so this was a big thing for me.

We visited the gift shop for a bit and got back on the road. It was a 4 hour drive to San Francisco from Garberville and we wanted to be able to eat lunch on Fisherman's Wharf. When we got to the bridge we noticed that it got a bit colder than we were getting used to. It had been so hot the last few days that we were all sweating by the time we got loaded each morning. The temperature said it was 64 and it was foggy. Many of us didn't bring jackets and were now regretting it. We found a place to park, walked to the Wharf and found a place for lunch. We picked a place that looked like it would have decent options for everyone which ended up being a place called Tarantino's. We just picked and we lucked out. This place was great! We had a great view of the fishing boats on the Wharf and the food was great.

When we left the restaurant we discovered it had gotten significantly colder than when we went in. We headed to Ghirardelli Square and luckily found some nice, inexpensive hoodies on our way. Nearly everyone bought one in a variety of colors and styles. We were now much more comfortable. One thing that I remembered about Ghirardelli Square from when I went years ago was the fun fountain. Amanda and Ranna went a few months ago and said it was under construction. I was hoping that the construction was done so we could all see it.

After Ghirardelli Square, we headed to Pier 39 to see the sea lions and to get some ice cream. There is of course a lot more to do at Pier 39 than these things, but we didn't really have the time. Unfortunately, it is the off season for the sea lions and there was only a handful there. I was so bummed because that was one of my favorite things last time I was there. So, we grabbed some ice cream and headed back to the vehicles. We decided we didn't want to drive down Lombard St. but we at least wanted to see it. So we drove by it and then headed out of town. It took us 2 hours to get to the Bay Bridge, traffic was a mess! When we finally got to the bridge, we discovered it was because they were doing construction and it went down to one lane. Hello, who thought this would be a good idea? While in traffic we got separated, and long story short version, we all decided to just meet at the Oakland Temple. These grounds are so pretty and I love the walkway on top of the temple with all of the foliage. We took a group picture in front of the Christus in the visitor's center and headed to the hotel. It was something we all needed to end the day.

Friday we headed into Sacramento. Seth needed to take some things and pick up some things from the mission office and so we all drove to Old Sacramento and we decided that Seth and my parents would go take care of that while the rest of us wandered around. We pretty much headed straight to the train museum. Zack was a big driving force behind this one because he LOVES Thomas and all his friends. He can name them all. Just as we were finishing up there we found out that the mission office wasn't even open and wouldn't be until about 2:00. Seth was so bummed because he wanted to see the museum and missed it for nothing.

By this time I was really dragging. I was not feeling well at all and had absolutely no energy. When we met up with my parents, my dad mentioned that my mom was concerned that she had strep. I started thinking...yup, those are the symptoms I was experiencing. We found a gorgeous place for lunch and we ate in the courtyard. Again, some place we just found and lucked out. The kids had room to move and play without disturbing other patrons and from what I'm told, the food was amazing. I didn't have enough of an appetite so I ordered the cheapest salad I could because I could see wasting money on something I wasn't going to enjoy just because I didn't feel well. I would love to go back and try it another time, not to mention there was so much of Old Sacramento we still did not see.

After Old Sacramento, we headed to the Sacramento Temple. This is a newer and smaller temple, but the grounds were amazing! It is close to a waste plant and it was cool to see where the temple grounds started and the difference in the vegetation. Ranna and I decided that it was dark and spooky versus bright and happy. They also have a park area with bathrooms, drinking fountains, sand pits and benches as part of the grounds.

At this point, we separated. People in my parent's van (me included) headed to the mission office and the other vehicles headed to Lake Tahoe. Not too much exciting to report at this point, but by the time we made it to Tahoe I was feeling better. They beauty of pain reliever! We didn't stay long, because it was getting late and the young kids had already been playing for about an hour and were basically done. They did have a lot of fun though.

We headed to our final hotel in Carson City and luckily it was only a half hour away. Some people went swimming and dinner kept getting later and later. By the time people were ready to go my energy was gone, so I just went to bed. Saturday we got up and got on the road a little later than the other days, but we didn't have any stops planned. We just headed home and by this time Britta and I were very anxious to make it home to see our sweethearts. At one of the rest stops we found a Native American couple who had set up a bunch of jewelry for sale. We all had fun looking and several of us bought something. Other than that, our long road home was pretty uneventful. I felt somewhat icky but mostly okay for most of the trip and boy was I glad to make it home and sleep in my own bed.

Flashback Friday - Family Vacation, part 1

I am finally getting around to posting about my vacation. I have been waiting, hoping to get some of the pictures other members of my family took. I decided I had better not wait anymore, because it is already a "flashback". I mean, it's been a week!

Let me preface this entire blog with this...vacation is much better when illness is not a part of it! My stomach, back and ribs acted up the night before we left, so I really didn't get much sleep. We wanted to leave my parent's house by 8:00 a.m. (we run on Putnam time, so this means earliest 8:30). I was in pain, so I called my chiropractor, hoping to get in early so that I didn't throw things off for anyone else. Luckily, due to Putnam time, I didn't. Steve and I dropped all my stuff off at my parent's and got it loaded and headed to the chiropractor while everyone else finished up. We got to the office around 8:15 or so and was done just after everyone left the house at 8:30. Everyone met Steve and I there, since it was in the general direction we needed to go anyway and wasn't too out of the way. I said good-bye to Steve, gingerly climbed into Britta's Jeep and off we went!

I rode most of the day with Britta, with a few hours with my parents when I decided I really needed a nap. I couldn't get a nap riding with Britta because I was on kid duty - changing movies, getting books or toys, getting snacks, etc. After some rest I really started to feel better and kid duty was ok. I did find the Nevada/California state line quite interesting. The scenery became a lot more interesting very suddenly!

Monday night we stayed in a town called Grass Valley in California. It is off of I-80 about a half hour and the drive into town was absolutely breath-taking! We chose Grass Valley because it was in the general area that we needed to go anyway and Britta and John lived there for a summer for John's internship. My parent's found this fabulous place to stay which completely spoiled us. We all loved it, especially the memory foam beds and the pool. They were just what we needed after the long day of driving we just had.

Our cute hotel the first night

Tuesday was a busy, busy day. We started by having a trip down memory lane for Britta. She wanted to show everyone where she and John lived for that summer. It was maybe 5 minutes from the hotel. Then we headed toward Yuba City and did a little bit of backtracking through Marysville to Beale Air Force Base for me. That is where Steve was born and since he wasn't able to come I wanted to go there for him. We took some pictures and Zack and Abby especially liked looking at the plane. On our way back through Marysville, we stopped at Wal-Mart, for Britta's sake. Her DVD players stopped working. It was only the 2nd day of a huge road trip with a 3 year old and a1 year old. She didn't want to go the rest of the trip without it...

After our shopping we decided it was time for lunch. We found a great park close by and stopped. It had a great pond and a bunch of ducks and geese that Abby truly enjoyed feeding. I'll tell you what though, those geese sure were pushy. You could even say they were the bullies of the bunch. When they found out that the ducks were getting food that they weren't, they charged right in and pushed the ducks out. It was very interesting to watch.

After lunch Seth pretty much ran the show. This was the day spent in his mission area and there were a lot of people he wanted to visit and some places he wanted to show us. Most of us stayed in vehicles when he went in but in Orland we were able to stop at a park so the kids could play. We ended up eating dinner pretty late and by that time the kids were ready to be done. After getting to the motel in Corning some of us went swimming, some of us went to bed and my parents and Seth went to visit more people. My stomach acted up Tuesday afternoon but swimming helped a lot.

Wednesday was the day for the Redwoods. Unfortunately for us, to get there from Corning, we had to drive up and over the mountain. This meant a lot of twisty roads, and quite a bit of car sickness, which lead to a lot of passenger swapping. I was already feeling slightly off so I got quite sick where I normally would not have. By the time we actually got to the Redwoods I could barely move, but got out of the car anyway. I wasn't about to miss the redwoods in the Avenue of the Giants.

The first place we stopped was the Immortal Tree. This massive tree has survived lightening, floods, pests and the axe. They even have year markers for each event. We spent a good amount of time at the gift shop there and I found the perfect gift for Steve, aside from the fun shot glass to add to his collection. We got back on the road and found a place for dinner in a gorgeous grove with a picnic table. It was here that I realized we did not have nearly enough time for the Redwoods. There are so many trails and other sites off the main roads that days could be spent in just the Avenue of the Redwoods. I laid down in the van for a bit before getting up to eat. I needed a chance to rest without being in a moving vehicle.

My parents chose to visit this specific section of the Redwoods because we all wanted to see a drive-through tree. We couldn't see one on the map, but the internet stated we would find one. We decided to turn around and go ask someone at the visitor's center where we could find one. They said it was off the main road but there were signs on the main road. We just didn't drive far enough. We found it and it was so much fun! I could not believe the size of these trees. The drive-through tree was large enough that Aaron could even drive his big truck through (Seth was actually driving, Aaron directed). They also had some play houses and a children's walk-through stump. Everyone had a blast, especially the kids!

The cute tree houses

Silly, silly Seth Sack - in the cute tree house

Aaron with Zack on his shoulders in the walk-through tree
Perspective - Aaron is about 6'8"

Anna in the walk-through stump

Getting out of the car was actually the best thing for me, and by the time we got to our motel I was feeling pretty good. We stayed at a tiny motel in Garberville, a small town just south of the Avenue of the Giants. We got to the motel Wednesday night much earlier in the evening than we did any other night. We went swimming before dinner and really had a good time. We planned to go to a smoothie place we saw as we came in, but when we got there we discovered they were only serving the fire fighters that were fighting the mostly contained fires on the mountain. So, we kept walking until we found an open place that looked family friendly. Overall dinner was a lot of fun. It stopped being fun when half of us got our food and finished it and still no pizza for the others. Luckily, the kids were still in good moods. Some of us headed back with the kids and some stayed to take care of getting the pizza to go (which was now free) and taking care of paying. Aaron brought the pizza back, but unfortunately not before Abby went to sleep. Don't worry, she didn't go to bed hungry. She had chocolate cake at the restaurant! Britta saved her a piece for the next day.

This is about all I am going to post for now. I will finish blogging about the trip later. Check back for more pictures...

Hiatus

It has been a while since I posted. We've been busy. Believe it or not, we really didn't do much of anything on the 4th. My stomach acted up and I was up all night in pain the night before, so I slept until 1:00 p.m. when Steve woke me up saying he couldn't in good conscience let me sleep anymore. The rest of the day I really felt lethargic and didn't feel up to doing much of anything at all. We did go get ice cream and watch the valley fireworks from up on the hill with Josie and Jaslin(we were going to go to West Jordan Park, but parking didn't exist, so we drove instead).

This week and weekend I have been getting ready to go on vacation. While I was at work I was busy trying to make sure I had all my loose ends tied up so that I didn't have to worry about anything not being done. When I was home I was cleaning up the house so I didn't leave a disaster. Yesterday I went with my mom to Sam's Club for snack food and then Ranna and I went to Good Earth so I could get some specialty food to take with me.

Today I have been quite busy getting things packed and organized. We are planning on leaving my parent's house at 8:00 a.m. which means getting up early enough to get everything in the car, go get some ice and get to my parent's house in time to get everything loaded up. I will be riding with Britta, Abby and Landon for most of the trip. Then my parent's will have them, Anna(a niece), Ranna, Seth and Joel. Then Amanda, Aaron and Zack will be in their truck. Unfortunately there are several people that are unable to come. Britta's husband, John, Steve, my brother Dirk and his wife Sarina all have to work and Eric, Dani and their girls were going to come but they are moving in a week and a half and now are not able to.

We will be coming home late Saturday, so there will likely be no communication from me online for a week, as I have no lap top. I will prepare to share our adventures when we return...

Flashback Friday - Life Story question

Steve and I have been planning to continue our story because we had fun doing it. We've been told that some people actually enjoyed reading it too. Here is our dilemma. We don't really see each other much during the week. In fact, this week it really has been very little. We usually have all day Saturday and Sunday, and this weekend we don't even have that. So, I am going to do something else for this week and then we will try to work on something during the week so that by Friday it will be ready to post.

I decided to cheat a little this week and pull a question out of my Life Story jar that would work for my Flashback Friday. The question is "Tell about any conditions surrounding your birth that you are aware of. Tell any interesting stories about your beginnings (how your name was chosen, any close calls)." Boy what a gem this is!

When I was 11 my mom wrote me a letter as part of a mutual project. It shares some about when I was born, but not all the really good stuff. But, I would like to share a little of it because it is in her words.

"I would like to tell you a little bit about the day you was born. It was a bright, sunny, early spring morning - March 26, 1977. We already had 2 little boys and were hoping to get a little girl. We were, of course, very please when we found out you was indeed a little girl. We were a little bit scared at first because you wasn't breathing right away, but it sure didn't take long to get you breathing. Once you started breathing, you started crying. What a set of lungs! You have been very quiet since then! Just kidding." (She really isn't kidding. I am a self-admitted loud-mouth!)

"You was one of the prettiest babies ever born at the Valley West Hospital in what was then called Granger, Utah. Things have really changed so it is now Pioneer Valley Hospital in West Valley City, Utah. The nurses made a fuss over you because you had so much long dark hair. At one time Dr. Astle, who delivered you, said, "One day she'll knock some young man for a loop." He thought you looked like you would really be pretty some day."

The next paragraph I am leaving out because it is very personal, but she mentions having health issues before and after I was born. When she was 4 months along, she started having contractions due to an asymptomatic urinary tract infection. This was obviously way to early to give birth so the hospital did what they could to stop the contractions. The way that was done at that time was through an alcohol drip. Yes, my mom got drunk due to this alcohol drip, this explains everything! She was a difficult patient and kept trying to get out of bed (very unlike her, she is a nurse and knows better), but in the end it worked and I was born only 3 weeks early.

Just after I was born they were not sure what my name would be. They knew my first name would be Mary because they wanted me to have that family name (it goes back to my great-great grandmother). Their inspiration for my middle name, what I would actually go by, came from an interesting source. When I was born, they still had shared hospital rooms and she was sharing with someone who also just gave birth to a little girl and also had a little boy. When her son came in to visit he was disappointed. He said "I wanted you to have a boy so we could name him Charlie Brown." They decided that would be a cute name for a girl, except as Charlene. So, I am named after Charlie Brown and I did not learn this until my friends gave me the nickname of Charlie (against my wishes) which ended up as Chuck (which I was okay with...go figure). Ironic.

What they didn't know at the time I was born was that part of the placenta had scarred next to the uterus due to the premature contractions. Since that part stayed behind her body didn't get the clear signal that she was not pregnant anymore and her milk did not come in. Therefore, I was not breast fed like my 7 siblings. I personally find this curious as I am the one in the family with the most health issues. It simply re-affirms to me the importance of breast milk. Anyway, about 5 weeks after I was born she started having issues due to the part of the placenta wall left behind. She ended up in the hospital with severe bleeding and the doctors gave her until a specified time to pull out of it or she would have an emergency hysterectomy. It looked like it was going to happen, but she was blessed and a half an hour before the determined time she pulled out of it and did not need to have the surgery.

She had 5 more children after that, all with very little or no complications. So, I say that I started out as a problem child and unfortunately I don't think much has changed. But I can say that I am truly grateful my mom was able to have more children for all the siblings I have. I would have been the youngest child and the only girl and if that had been the case I would have been a spoiled brat - no questions!

I have an amazing family and I am so blessed to be a part of it. I consider some of my siblings among my best friends and I can not imagine my life without them.